I like to be comfortable. I like to stay in the same routines I am used to, serve in the same roles, spend time with my regular friends, do 'easy' tasks at church that don't require a lot of sacrifice. Although I have grown up in church and have been a Christian for many years, I don't think I've really ever gone too far out of my comfort zone. I have been on mission trips to several countries, served on committees, helped with Sunday School and VBS, sang in the choir, organized mission projects...I've done the whole "church member" thing. But ask me how many times I've stopped to share Jesus with a stranger or to tell a group of people outside of the church about how much He has changed my life and there aren't too many examples. See, I've told God "hey, I'm ready to serve, but I want it to be my way. I'm willing to be a greeter at church, and sing in the choir. I will make treat bags to take to the nursing home and type up prayer requests for my SS class, but that's all I'm willing to offer right now". And while those things are all well and good, I was basically putting limits on how useful I could be to God. I've fallen into the trap of living life the way that I want to, and just fitting God into any spaces that are left.
A few months ago, God began whispering to me that it was time for change. It was time to be obedient and be willing to go do whatever HE told me to do, whether it was in my plans or not.
"We often surrender our OUTWARD behavior to God, but we don’t make our commitment absolute. We don’t make a TOTAL surrender of self; to relinquish our lives unconditionally to Him. Jesus wants everything , He always has. When we say that we want to be His disciple, yet attach a list of conditions, Jesus refuses to accept our terms. His terms involve unconditional surrender…To be a disciple means forsaking EVERYTHING to follow Jesus, unconditionally, putting our lives completely in His hands." (Rich Stearns- Hole in Our Gospel)
Wow...read that quote again. Unconditionally. Is that possible for me to do? Is it something I am comfortable doing? Will it be easy? No. No and No. But yet, God kept whispering and then shouting it to me. No matter how much I want to plan, to tell God where I best "fit", it is not my decision. My being comfortable isn't what I have been called to do. You see, I don't think that Christ came just so that I could be comfortable...He came so that we might be saved and so that we can point others straight back to Him as well. It's not about my trying to "do" enough to be worthy of His sacrifice, it's about me being so grateful for what He has done that I can't help but want to lead others to Him as well.
The last few months have been very eventful here in our household and have brought about some changes in the way we are trying to live out our faith and make Jesus famous. I will post tomorrow about one of the first steps I decided to take in this journey. To be continued tomorrow...